I am a gay bottom
Bottom shame as a gay male (major triggers)
There is so much to talk about here and so much with which I related.
But first off, if someone hasnt yet, I wanted to welcome you to MS. I found here about 2 or 3 years ago and its been something really healing for me. Not only have the people been receptive and supportive, but its been really validating to understand my feelings, the shame, and the guilt i piled onto myself for decades isnt unique, nor is my experience. I might be a bit older than you as it sounds fond of you did a lot of the work in your 20s that I did in my 30s, but Ive also create that the work and the healing has been really excellent for me. I hope you find it to be the same. Despite the pain and the hardships of going through the journey its worth it.
I was 10, when my abuse stopped. I was in a similar boat as you. I didnt really recognize what it was that I was doing. Now, that round of stuff went on with an older boy the neighborhood. He was 15/16, and not with an adult, but Im told it is still considered exploitation. The reason for it closure was
Ever wanted to recognize the secrets to becoming a influence bottom? Want to know how to look after the bottoms in your life? Curious to give bottoming a try but not sure how to begin?
We can aid you become a better bottom! Here are some immediate bottoming tips and tricks from ACON’s peer-workshop Booty Basics.
1. Lube
The arse does not produce its own lubrication.
This means that lube is really, really crucial for any anal play. First, to stop damage to the internal lining of your arse. Second, to produce bottoming (and topping!) more pleasurable. And third, to aide protect it from infections.
Remember to employ water or silicon-based lubes, as oil-based lubes can wreck condoms.
2. You
The second principle is YOU. This is the one that covers off all the mental and sentimental aspects such as making sure you feel safe, making sure there is consent, that you feel comfortable, that you know your own bottoming limits and desires.
Remember, sex is best for everyone if all the people committed are motivated by trying to maximise everyone’s pleasure safely. You can’t be a good companion and you c
Any gay bottom guys like me?
xenogeneic-red-chipmunk1
I’m in a monogamous relationship with a great guy, and sex has never been anything less than superb . The thing is, I’m a bottom, and my partner is a uppermost. So most of the time I don’t bother trying to get an erection or have an orgasm, I just emphasis on his pleasure. He’s been great about encouraging me to come after he does, but it’s like I’m too scared to try. He’s offered to give me leader, or do other stuff I like, to assist get me stimulated, and I’m pretty sure I could because I’ve done that in the past. But I like him so much, and because it’s not just a hookup, I feel this pressure to not disappoint him and I don’t want him to acquire frustrated if it takes me a really prolonged time to come. I’ve told him I crave to try and he was excited about that. I’ve done the first phase of the courses and I’m starting to feel more confident but it still makes me anxious when I ponder about trying. Just wondering if anybody has ever had a similar experience.
26 Likes
sweet-black-dog2
I’m not gay but I think I can relate in the feeling of
Im gay and Im not a top or a bottom Im a side
As a queer man, prying strangers and potential hook-ups alike possess asked me one scrutinize more times than I’ve had hot dinners.
‘Top or bottom?’
Words get me out of bed in the morning, and when uttered by the right people at the right second, they’ve also been famous to get me into bed.
But neither of these – highest or bottom – accurately describe what I choose to get up to in the boudoir, so my response has always been a guarded mix of shrug and mumble.
Here’s the tea: I’m actually a ‘side’, a word coined by American psychotherapist and sexologist Joe Kort to describe those, appreciate me, for whom penetrative sex – in either position – does very little.
Getting the peach involved is, quite literally, a pain in the ass, but as for the aubergine, let’s just say that hands and mouths always realize the assignment way better.
To continue the food metaphor: if man-on-man action were a dinner party, I’d have zero interest in sitting down to a bland meal when the amuse-bouches are so good.
I confess tha